The Border
While crossing the US-Mexican border on his bicycle, the man was stopped by a guard who pointed to two sacks the man had on his shoulders. "What's in the bags?", asked the guard.
"Sand," said the cyclist.
"Get them...
Excuse
A man was driving home late one afternoon, and he was driving above the speed limit. He notices a police car with its red lights on in his rear view mirror. He thinks "I can outrun this guy," so he floors it and the race...
Bingo
On a busy street in New York City, a man hustles across an intersection and is just about makes it to the other side before he’s hit by a bus.
He lies dying on the sidewalk as a crowd gathers around.
"A priest. So...
Deep Freeze
Two men who were waiting at the pearly gates strike up a conversation.
"How did you die?" the first man asks the second.
"I froze to death," says the second.
"That's awful," says the first man.
"How does it f...
The Limo
After getting all of the Pope's luggage loaded into the limo ( he doesn't travel light), the driver notices that the Pope is still standing on the curb.
"Excuse me, your Eminence, "says the driver, "Would you please t...
Day At The Bar
A bartender was washing glasses one afternoon when an elderly Irishman came in. With great difficulty, the Irishman hoisted his bad leg over the barstool, pulled himself up painfully, and asked for a sip of Irish whiskey...
Devil
The priest was preparing a man for his long day's journey into night. Whispering firmly, the priest said, "Denounce the devil! Let him know how little you think of his evil!"
The dying man said nothing. The priest repe...
George Washington
"George Washington, did YOU chop down the cherry tree?" "No, Dad."
"I think you are lying." "No, no, no! I swear I did NOT chop down the cherry tree."
"Son, I saw you out here with your ax. Your punishment will be ...
Pumpkin
How do you change a pumpkin into another vegetable?
You throw it up in the air and it comes down squash. ...
Super Bowl
During the Super Bowl, there was another football game of note between the big animals and the little animals. The big animals were crushing little animals and at half-time, the coach made a passionate speech to rally th...
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